Sunday, April 17, 2011

To the fanboys...

No, this is not a review of the movie Fanboys.  This is a rant.  To be precise, it is the top 3 reasons I don't like fanboys.  Be forewarned, this is not for the faint of heart.

1. They have too much to say.

Granted, this is not entirely their fault as the studios and filmmakers have placed way too much emphasis on polling and their opinion in the past few years.  The best example is Spider-Man 3.  Sam Raimi wanted to do Sandman.  The fanboys heard through the grapevine (which is not an accurate news source...duh) that the studio was considering Venom.  All of a sudden, there was this huge groundswell through the fanboys to get Venom in the movie.  The studio through Avi Arad pressured Sam Raimi to add Venom, even though he didn't know who that was.  So, he added Venom and the result was a mishmash which was ridiculed by the fanboys for being bad. 

I want to add that Raimi had done a pretty good job up to that point with parts 1 and 2.  They were both commercial and critical successes.  Why not leave well enough alone?  Why not let Raimi do the movie he wanted to do, instead of forcing this extra villain on him and ruining not only Venom, but Sandman as well?  Simply because the fanboys have too much to say.  They wanted Venom since there was talk of a Spider-Man movie.  I don't even know how Venom became as popular as he did, all I know is all the fanboys was horny to get Venom into a Spider-Man movie, no matter what.  Now 3 failed and when something big fails, the studio does whatever it reboots the whole thing.  So now, we have Peter Parker back in school for part 4.  Yay.

2. They care too much about what the mainstream thinks.

So, I tell people I read comics and collect various items related to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Raiders of the Lost Ark, etc.  I usually get the answer "how old are you?"  You see, there's a common misconception out there that comics, toys, etc are just for kids.  You know what I don't see at a lot of toy shows?  Kids.  I see people with white hair.  I see people as old as I am and older.  I'm sure there's some middle-aged man out there with a kickass Barbie collection.  See, the mainstream are ignorant and what you do with ignorant people is usually a) educate them or b) ignore them.  I usually opt for option B.

However, filmmakers are trying to kowtow to the ignorant masses.  The best example of recent member was The Dark Knight.  Now, before you all rocket emails to me (or would rocket them to me if you had my email), let me just say, that I like The Dark Knight.  I own the special edition on DVD.  I will own the Blu-ray.  I did not think The Dark Knight sucked.  However, I don't think it was this masterpiece everyone else thought.  The Joker didn't have enough pranks, he was too organized and too sane, there was far too much emphasis on Harvey Dent and what he was doing, we had to wait the entire movie for Two-Face and then he dies at the end...there was a lot that could have been better about The Dark Knight.

However, the mainstream loves the movie.  Of course, they took a lot of the fantasy out of it and made it "realistic".  Since the mainstream is mainly comprised of people totally lacking in imagination (the distaste for Sucker Punch is a prime example), this was the perfect time for fanboys to wield their clout.  The opposite happened, though.  The fanboys fell in step with the mainstream.  Why?  Because something they liked was finally universally accepted.  They were no longer "not cool" for liking Batman.  My response?  Eff the mainstream.  Where were you guys when I was getting my ass kicked?  The answer: No where.  It may not be popular to like comic books and fantasy and what not, but I don't care.  I like what I like and that's it.  I don't see a need to compromise on that and the fanboys shouldn't be worried about what a bunch of ignorant jackasses think.  But they do, which makes them no better.

3. They don't support what they profess to love.

Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World is the prime example of this.  Scott Pilgrim was this wacky, fun, comedy/fantasy movie that felt like a video game.  It was reportedly and apparently true to the comic book and was made the way it was specifically for the fanboys.  Now, I never read the comic but I still went out, paid my money to see the movie, then bought the movie on DVD.  I supported it, even though until the movie came out, I had not even HEARD of Scott Pilgrim.  You know what, though?  The fanboys didn't go out and see it.  It didn't make anywhere near the money it should have, considering how much supposed demand there was for this comic to be made into a movie.

So, here's the thing.  You're a fanboy.  You're probably not that popular (even though you probably have Dark Knight stickers taped to your forehead).  You probably don't have a lot of friends and even if you do, they're probably not popular, either.  You probably don't have a girlfriend.  You probably eat lunch at school alone a lot and you probably get picked on a lot.  Hey, been there, done that, I've got bones that are just getting discovered they were broken for getting beaten up a lot as a kid, like twenty years later.  I'm not here to judge.  What I am saying is you guys should be embracing what you love.  You don't have a lot of things going for you in today's rotten society, so do yourselves a favour and at least stand for something and support the stuff you truly do love, not the stuff that everyone else thinks it's okay for you to love.  If you don't start supporting that, even that will be taken away from you.  Then what?

So, that's the 3 reasons I hate fanboys.  In all honesty, everyone bitches about how studios are screwing up the film landscape with their remakes, sequels and rehashes and by all means, they're right.  However, the fanboys have a responsibility, too.  Thanks to the internet, the fanboys have never had so much power, they can reach out and email these execs and filmmakers, they can rant on forums, they can refuse to pay to watch what isn't faithful, they have more power to wield than ever before.  Instead, they want to be accepted and popular and be like the ignorant masses.  I got bad news for you boys: it isn't worth it.  So, like what you like and if someone tells you you're stupid or childish for liking it, tell them to go to hell.  There's more important things in the world to worry about than what the jabroni in the next cubicle thinks.

- Stephenstein

No comments:

Post a Comment