Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Top 5 Most Baffling Saturday Morning Cartoons Based On Sitcoms

In the 70’s and 80’s, Saturday morning cartoons were the norm. The top 3 American networks at the time (ABC, CBS and NBC) competed against each other with cartoons that would attract the luractive (and burgeoning) advertising dollars of rising toy companies like Hasbro, Mattel, Kenner, etc. (who have all become corporate giants since then, if they haven’t been bought by Hasbro). In this time, networks scoured the earth to find ideas for cartoons to fill their schedules, and sometimes they looked no further than their own prime time schedules. However, in trying to come up with cartoon plots, the networks often tinkered with their own ideas and came up with stuff that was insanity itself. Try to figure out what these folks were smoking when they dreamt these shows up as we go through our top 5 most baffling cartoon spin-offs.


#5: Gilligan’s Planet





So, the characters of Gilligan’s Island can’t get off the island on the TV show, but in the cartoon they CAN build a space ship out of wood and fly off to the far reaches of the universe. First off, if you want to escape the island and go to civilization, why build a space-ship? And if you CAN build a spaceship, then why not downsize and build a plane? Fly to America or something. This show could have gone past a season, but the thing is that the planet they land on is frickin’ boring. Now instead of sunny locales, you get rocky terrain and dreary skies. You also get the requesit funny animal sidekick so common in cartoons of this era, this time in the form of a lizard that does nothing. Gleek would kick its ass.


#4: Laverne and Shirley Join the Army





What child honestly watched Laverne and Shirley seriously? I only cared about that pompadour guy and I can’t even remember his name. Anyways, he’s not in this. Laverne and Shirley…well, they join the Army like the title says. Once there, they team up with a funny animal sidekick (this time a Pig in a General’s uniform, who looks a lot like the pigs from The Racoons) and fight a giant ape and space aliens, as the U.S. armed forces usually does. I like that the writers realized that they couldn’t show Laverne and Shirley fighting Soviets or supporting Afghanistan in the 80’s, so they whipped up all this fake shit for them to have adventures with.


#3: Fonz and the Happy Days Gang



Fonz and the Happy Days Gang. Now, what does that title say to you? What do you think off? Fonz and the characters of the Happy Days show getting into teenage hijinks and shinanigans, right? RIGHT? Well, that’s what a normal person would think. But, wouldn’t you know it, Fonz happens upon a time-traveling “future chick” named Cupcake (I guess they ran out of good names in the future) and takes Ralph and Richie through time and now they can’t get back to 1957 because Cupcake is a dumbass. Oh, and there’s a funny animal sidekick in the form of a dog (can’t remember his name).

Laverne and Shirley and Fonz and the Gang were actually two of three Gary Marshal sitcoms that were made into cartoons. The other one was Mork and Mindy which was surprisingly intact compared to the show (with funny animal sidekick added, of course). You would think that an alien from outer space who comes from an egg would crank up the ol’ creative juices for the cartoon, what with Fonz being relegated to time-travel. But no! Just leave things the way they are! Odd. These three toons were part of “The Mork & Mindy, Laverne & Shirley and The Fonz Hour”. Rolls right off the tongue, doesn’t it?

Out of curiousity's sake, I give you:

The Mork & Mindy, Laverne & Shirley and The Fonz Hour





#2: Partridge Family 2200 A.D.





Ah, the Partridge Family. I used to watch this on CKVR here in Ontario, where I caught a lot of old syndicated shows. It was colourful, cheesy and really camp. So, imagine my surprise when I found out that there was actually a cartoon based on Partridge Family. And taking place in the future, no less! How the hell they end up in the future, I actually don’t quite know. I think it’s implied that they just always lived there or something, and that there’s no real link to the live-action show. The real reason, of course, is that Hannah Barberra had all these old backgrounds and cells leftover from The Jetsons and when they were to make a Partridge Family cartoon, they thought it was cheaper to just reuse old materials for the show. And that’s what’s called high quality animation production, folks.


#1: Punky Brewster





Coming in at number 1 is an animated version of the precocious, adorable sitcom character Punky Brewster. The sitcom itself was about this orphan kid who is taken in by a crotchety old man and then befriends the requisite annoying kid sidekicks who each have a little quirk to set them apart from one another. The cartoon, on the other hand, was about Punky playing in a park somewhere and then following a rainbow to its end. And did she find Leprechauns and a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? No! Please remember that these cartoons were made by crack heads. Instead of Leprechauns, Punky discovers a village of hairy, anthropomorphic creatures who can grant wishes at a moment's notice. One of them hangs out with Punky (which along with Punky's dog account for not one, but TWO funny animal sidekicks) and they get into hilarious hijinks together. Now, what about the sitcom screams hairy wish-giving, rainbow-dwelling creature?? Where the HELL did this come from?? Kids who were fans of the prime-time show were left scratching their heads from this one. I mean, at this point, kids understood that cartoons based on sitcoms were highly suspect, but this show looked to all the world like they just took a concept that was bumping around the office and attached Punky Brewster to it. This wasn't as bad a travesty as when they shattered all realism on the prime-time show by having Punky visit a haunted cave, but I won't go there.
Well, that's it for now. Untill next time.
-Deceptisean

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