Sunday, April 15, 2012

Nearly A-bad-don


So, a while ago, this guy at work gave my Abandon.  He said it was a great movie and I would like it.  Now, I knew this guy didn't know movies -- no more evidence was needed than he gave me the Fullscreen version of the film.  Unless you have no other choice, you don't buy the Fullscreen version.  Anyhow, last night I finally got around to seeing the movie. 


So, firstly, let me just say that I was sitting there watching the movie and I was saying to myself "the only way this movie could be redeemed is if this happens."  Luckily, what I thought should happen, actually happened.  So that's good, at least.  Let me tell you something though: if what I thought should happen didn't happen, then this movie is a bunch of garbage.  


So, the story goes that Benjamin Bratt's character is assigned a missing person's for this artsy-fartsy guy from a local college (think of one of those pompous windbags who does head-scratching artistic stuff that makes no sense and thinks he's better than anyone else) and Katie Holmes was his girlfriend at the time of his disappearance. As the investigation goes on, Katie starts seeing him everywhere and he begins to menace her. Meanwhile, her and Ben are starting something up.  Now, before the twist, I was seriously disliking the movie. Katie Holmes was either acting bad or her character just sucked.  Likewise, the missing person was a douche and I couldn't imagine anyone caring if he was found, other than the fact he was rich.  All this was ironed out with the ending, so I'll let it pass, but there are some things I won't. 


Firstly, Katie Holmes' friends, led by Zooey Deschanel.  What is their purpose other than being annoying?  Seriously, I could have done with all of them being massacred by Jason Vorhees, they were that annoying. Secondly, the relationship between Katie and Ben, too contrived and too forced.  The director/screenwriter said that their chemistry was undeniable but I am denying it, large.  They had no chemistry and it didn't work.  Thirdly, and this isn't giving anything away, but Katie's character has abandonment issues with men.  Hence the title.  So, along comes Gabriel Mann (Nolan from TV's Revenge) and he's a nice, normal, stable guy who happens to love Katie but she doesn't return his love.  If a woman has abandonment issues, does it not stand to reason that she would go with the nice, safe, stable guy who wouldn't leave her because he got tired of her?  That just didn't make sense to me. 


Overall, this is a movie that needs 2 viewings -- one to get the bad taste out of your mouth on some of the stuff going on in the film and then the 2nd one to watch it with the understanding of how the movie ended.  For people who don't know much about film, this movie will probably rock your world.  For those of us that do, you will probably call the twist well in advance and while the movie isn't terrible, it's not that great.  Any movie that needs to be elevated by a twist at the end is not good writing -- it's just trying to hide how mediocre the rest of the plot is. 


Rating: a very generous 3 out of 5. 


- Stephenstein

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